Saturday, December 31, 2022

The Great Race

The papers were plastered with celebratory headlines proclaiming the race worthy of history and the victory a miracle. By some accounts, this was one of  the great underdog victories of all time- though needless to mention neither of the involved animals was a canine.

While the kingdom was enraptured with romantic notions of a triumph against impossible odds, those who watched the actual race described it as a slow and plodding snooze-fest.

In the weeks after, there were rumors that match-fixing was responsible for the upset. The tabloids reported a sizzling exposé based on accounts from two unnamed eyewitnesses, though the local bookmakers denied any foul play and dismissed such talk as "a cock and bull story". The bookmakers subsequently issued a public apology for making unwarranted racial comments.

After much investigation, no trace of any wrongdoing was found. The lopsided result was ruled to be entirely due to a "hare-brained race strategy".